the miracle inside of you

He was sitting on the doorsteps and waiting fo something good to happen. But it didnt. And worse than that, there was no visible or invisible sign of anything good that was about to appear.

Nada. Niente. Former silver smoky sky and deeply phylosophical autumn-ish weather, now represented nothinig else but depressing grey-ish picture from some suicidal emo-gothic movie.

Peter was far from being a depressive type. But noone is safe these days.

So he began searching for an exit. Regular mild analize and few phone calls to few close cheering friends would solve the moodiness, but not now. Briefly going through some names on the phone book was enough to reallize that this time actually is different. And probably so should be the solution.

Efraim's house in the heart of Old Jaffa was invisible for a stranger's eye - not hidden or something, it's just that on these small narrow streets, you can never tell if it's a wall, an entrance to a chamber or an old scary cave - a finding of some archeologyst. Efraim was well known for his wisdom but he wasnt the kind of "i know what you came for, stranger". So he welcomed Peter, offered him some tea and listened to his heart speaking. The he reminded him the old saying that "only fool does the same thing over and over again and expects new outcome". Then they just chatted, as if they were college-mates, about politics, sports and girls...and when Peter already at the door, sure that the old man was nothing but a talkative mate, nothing of the "spiritual" type, 

Efraim said "you are a good guy, Peter, but you used to believe in people too much and now, when you seem to open your eyes, you feel disappointment and that causes a certain lack of kindness in your heart. That's what bothers you. It kills your joy. You preffer to blindly believe people and get disappointed once in a while than to feel this mistrust that you do now. It's new to you and makes you feel deeply uncomfortable. Find kindness in your heart and you'll be healed".

Peter walked out of his door enlightened. Although nothing has happened, the world didnt change, neither did he, but he felt reliefed that he could let some of the old kindness back in his heart, give a charity penny without feeling angry (he is surely getting drugs), because if he decides to buy food - now he will be able to...talking to so-called friends without feeling used because just the way they want your money/support/help, you need their attention, which is also an interest, not as mercantile, but still - its always about something each side needs, cause even if you play with a pet - you want its' affection, so it's not as pure as it seems. 

Peter walked down the street and felt that his strength is coming back to him and realized that Efraim was right - he couldnt live without faith in good. And now, when his eyes were wide open he could experience this in a new, concious, different way. He knew how the world worked, but still believed that there is some good in it, that people were good, just every one was searching for happiness in another way...blindly trying everything they can...

Peter smiled  cause now he knew - you are the miracle, it is inside of you